When it comes to the crunch

OPINION: Every club has had a self-styled hardman or two down the years – just don’t be surprised when somebody gets hurt

Friday, 1st December 2023 — By Richard Osley

Tottenham Spurs Stadium

FIRST off: Rodrigo Bentancur is a gem of a footballer at Spurs and makes them a better team. He doesn’t deserve his rotten luck with injuries.

Equally, Matty Cash, the Aston Villa defender who smashed into him on Sunday, doesn’t deserve to be subjected to threats, as have come his way from the usual gross corners of the internet.

It’s a passionate game and Tottenham fans are going to be sad and angry, and want to stick up for their own – but as long as they have Cuti Romero in their defence, the hair-pulling, scythe-tackling centre back who they have celebrated for his hardman persona, it’s hard to not see that one rebounding the wrong way.

And it’s not just Spurs. Even though we all know crunching and careless tackling can ruin careers, every club has had a self-styled hardman or two down the years (apart from Leicester, who had Robbie Savage) and more often than not they have been cheered as great characters or cult heroes, commended for never flinching from a tackle and given pundit jobs in retirement.

We are told they bring strength and mettle to a team, that they can neutralise an opponent in the first five minutes of a match with a reducer. They are the loudest clap in a pre-match huddle, the alpha bully who hides a teammate’s socks behind the showers. These are the players that are ready to go to war for your club, ugh!, the first over the trenches, always ready for BATTLE. Charge. Fight. Tackle. Yes. They don’t ever want a head bandage – let this bad boy bleed!

Maybe this is why Sky Sports loved to have the master shin-kicker Graeme Souness as an analyst for so long.

Vinnie Jones, meanwhile, was able to shape himself into a lovable figure ready for the movies, despite the ravioli of human cartilage which is probably still smeared over his old boots. We all have a good laugh together too about the snippy comments Roy Keane will deliver to order on TV these days.

Having trained himself to go viral by playing the part of ‘Roy Keane’ in the studio, Roy Keane has become a source of entertainment as we wait to see how grumpy he can be at half-time.

What a great guy, if you ignore all the butcher tackles he used to administer in his playing days, including the one hammered out to Alf-Inge Haaland.

There is not much fun in Manchester City’s purchase of five league titles – the only crumb being the twist of Haaland’s son coming back to haunt Keane’s old team by regularly reminding United they are now second fiddle in their own city.

Hardmen though – if you love them like you do, let’s not be so surprised when somebody gets hurt.

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